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Dysregulation

A label misused to medicalise the human cost of systems built for harm. Dysregulation is the word adults use when a child’s nervous system responds authentically to an environment that is unbearable. It is often wielded as a behavioural diagnosis rather than a distress signal. This tag examines how schools pathologise reactions to their own failures, and how neurodivergent children are punished for surviving conditions they did not choose.

  • The orange shirt I folded

    The orange shirt I folded

    I was folding laundry late one night, brain running on the kind of background grief that rarely quiets, when my hand closed around the orange shirt. I moved to set it aside—automatically, instinctively—because I remembered September was coming, school would be starting, and Orange Shirt Day would follow quickly after. That shirt would be needed…

  • Flourishing as an ethical imperative

    Flourishing as an ethical imperative

    Like many of you, I caught CBC’s Ideas episode the other day, where philosopher Angie Hobbs spoke about the ancient Greek concept of eudaimonia—a term sometimes translated as happiness or welfare, but more richly understood as human flourishing. In a world flooded by crisis, it may seem indulgent or impractical to contemplate the good life,…

  • 7 signs your child (or you) is being positioned as the problem to preserve the group

    7 signs your child (or you) is being positioned as the problem to preserve the group

    When a parent becomes too precise, too prepared, or too emotionally honest, the school system may cast them—or their child—as the problem. This essay outlines seven signs that scapegoating is being used to preserve group harmony at the cost of justice, with particular attention to how this dynamic unfolds in British Columbia public schools.

  • On masking and self regulation

    On masking and self regulation

    One of the most surprising and disorienting lessons I’ve learned—through parenting neurodivergent twins, through surviving the school system alongside them, and through slowly unmasking myself—was this:  You can’t fake regulation You cannot breathe slowly enough, sit still enough, or smile warmly enough to convince a child you are calm when your nervous system is in…

  • Poise as pedagogy

    Poise as pedagogy

    There is a cost to composure that institutions never count. When schools reward mothers for staying calm in the face of harm, they turn grace into a gatekeeping tool and punish those who dare to grieve out loud.

  • Bound by blood

    Bound by blood

    Maternal embodiment and the unbearable violence of institutional disbelief. We were once one body There is a biological, emotional, and moral reality so fundamental that no policy manual can contain it, and no professional training can domesticate it—my child once lived inside me. His limbs pressed against my ribs before they ever touched the outside…

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