Neurodiversity
A paradigm shift in understanding learning, behaviour, and support needs—centred on acceptance, not correction.
-
On Stuart Shanker’s Self-Reg
I remember the feeling—desperate, hollowed out, shaking in that way that only comes when the world around you is collapsing and everyone keeps handing you checklists.
-
Few of us remain our best selves in a room starved of air
If you are a parent of a neurodivergent child, you can recite the script before the phone even buzzes. “[Child] had a very good day and really showed leadership with the younger kids” Pause. “But in the afternoon [Child] had some unexpected behaviour. [Child] is waiting at the office.” Praise is meant to help us feel that…
-
No school at all is better than what he endured
No school at all is better than what he endured. That’s the truth I need to say out loud.The harm was not abstract. It was daily, specific, institutional. The classroom was a place where his distress was normalised.Where his needs were pathologised, and his presence was treated as a problem to be managed.He was punished…
-
When school discipline undermines trust at home
There’s a problem in our schools. You’ll see it on a child’s face when they come home. You’ll hear it in the way they describe something that left them feeling humiliated, angry, or confused—and often, all three at once. It happens when school staff use discipline strategies that completely contradict the values a student has…
-
School District 48 (Sea to Sky): a neurodiversity-informed policy critique
SD48 conduct decision flow (simplified) ⚠️ Critical analysis ✅ Strengths ❌ Gaps Neurodiversity lens: how the policy holds up Dimension Assessment Notes Disability justice ✅ Partial Equity and accommodation are mandated, but process and supports unspecified Neurodivergent alignment ⚠️ Weak No mention of executive function needs, sensory regulation, impulsivity, masking, or meltdown management Protection from…
-
SJ Burnside Continuing Education (SD61): a neurodiversity‑informed policy critique
SJ Burnside Education Centre is an Alternative Education program serving youth aged 13–18 in a small-group, flexible setting. Its published Code of Conduct emphasises high standards of conduct, honesty, integrity, and cooperation during all school-sponsored activities. It explicitly promotes peaceful problem-solving, community engagement, and maintains a personal device policy (e.g., cell phones may be removed if abused). Student Code of Conduct SJ Burnside conduct decision…
-
Rot at the root: Why POPARD must be dismantled from the top down
When I first objected to the strategies POPARD proposed, I tried—truly—to assume good intent: that if I just gave them the right information, the clearest language, the most generous interpretation of their mandate, they would course-correct and stop pushing reward charts onto an already-traumatised child. I wrote careful emails, cited the psychologist’s diagnosis, offered specific…
-
He doesn’t go from zero to sixty
“He’s not a car,” I said, exasperated, after someone described Robin as going from zero to sixty. The withering look I received in return was pure disgust—as though I had interrupted a sacred adult ritual, as though I may as well have had a huge boil in the middle of my forehead, oozing pus. But…
-
Dear other mom, I’ve got a few things to say
I know you’re trying not to make it worse. You write the careful email. You show up composed. You give everyone the benefit of the doubt. You try to keep the tone warm, even when your stomach turns. You’re doing everything you can to stay in the conversation—because you believe that if you’re reasonable, they…
-
A perspective taking primer for educators
Perspective taking is the disciplined art of stepping outside one’s own cognitive scaffolding and entering, as fully as possible, into the sensorium of another person. It is not sympathy, which radiates concern from a safe emotional distance, nor is it projection, which mistakes one’s own feelings for universal truth. Instead, it is an intentional, methodical…
-
Collective punishment: unjust in schools, unjust everywhere
Collective punishment—punishing a group for the actions of an individual—is widely recognised as a violation of human rights. It is condemned in international law, yet it persists in various forms worldwide. From China’s persecution of human rights defenders’ families to Israel’s blockade of Gaza and the Taliban’s illogical governance, collective punishment disproportionately harms innocent people.…
-
How to smell a rat: spotting fake neurodiversity-affirming programs
Not everything wrapped in soft colours and “nervous system” talk is safe. In a post-ABA world—or at least a world where ABA has learned to change its clothes—many school districts, parent training programs, and private providers now claim to be “neurodiversity-affirming.” They use the language of trauma, talk about connection, and sprinkle in phrases like…
-
Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA)
Pathological Demand Avoidance is a neurobiological profile of autism rooted in anxiety, autonomy, and nervous system threat perception. For children with PDA, even simple requests can register as danger. A question, a suggestion, a cheerful invitation—all of these may activate a survival response, because the child’s nervous system experiences demand as threat. When this pattern…
-
How classroom values become ableist barriers
There is no such thing as a neutral rule. Every expectation reflects a theory of the child: what is normal, what is ideal, what is possible. And in most classrooms, these theories are wrong. I was given a list of behavioural values from my child’s class—Division 3. It included items like: stay in the group,…
-
Profound loss amplifies calls for better training
I was in the car with my children when I first heard the story of Chase, the 15-year-old boy who was shot and killed by police, in Surrey. It’s deeply distressing to hear this, knowing full well that my kids are recalibrating their worldview. Kids can be shot. My children sometimes process auditory information more…
-
When autistic girls fawn and schools look away
They told her to be polite while she was being harmed. Now they call her difficult for saying no. Jeannie never screamed—never yelled or stormed out or flipped a desk or tore paper into confetti; instead, she froze, and in that freezing, she vanished from their view. No one interrupted the boy when he joked…
-
The cost of compliance – the foundational critique and case for change
When children are dysregulated, the response from educators is too often punitive. For neurodivergent students in particular, the cost of these responses is high: shame, trauma, social exclusion, and a deep erosion of trust. But it does not have to be this way. Restorative alternatives are not new. They are ancient practices found in many…
-
Why i started this campaign
As a solution architect and parent of disabled children, I’ve seen the public education system from both sides. What I’ve found is not a system in crisis—it’s a system functioning exactly as designed: rewarding compliance, punishing difference, and quietly discarding those who don’t fit. This post explores how exclusionary practices like collective punishment persist in…
-
She’s agonised inside and that doesn’t count?
Much of this unfolded in 2022 and 2023, during a period when my daughter remained undiagnosed as autistic, unsupported in any formal way, and largely invisible to the school system. The patterns described here continue to shape our lives. In this essay, you’ll hear the cautious hope I carried—that a formal diagnosis would unlock the…