When your child has problems at school in BC: a guide for newcomer parents

Does your child have behaviour problems at school? Does the school want to make a “safety plan”? Are you worried about what will happen?

This guide will help you understand your rights. It will help you get support for your child.

You are not alone

Many parents feel confused when the school talks about behaviour problems. The school uses words you might not know. They have meetings with many people. You might feel scared or worried.

You have rights. Your child has rights. This guide will help you understand what to do.

Step 1: Get help from an advocate

An advocate is a person who helps you talk to the school. They know the rules. They can come to meetings with you. They can help you write letters.

InclusionBC has advocates who help parents for free.

Email them: advocacy@inclusionbc.org

Tell them:

• Your child’s name and age
• Your school’s name
• What problems are happening

They will help you.

Step 2: Understand your rights in school meetings

The school might want to have a meeting about your child. You have rights in these meetings.

You can bring someone with you

You do not have to go to meetings alone. You can bring:

• A friend
• A family member
• An advocate
• Anyone who can help you

Tell the school before the meeting: “I am bringing someone to help me.”

You can have an interpreter

If English is not your first language, you can ask for an interpreter. The school must provide one.

Tell the school: “I need an interpreter. I speak [your language].”

The school must give you copies

The school must give you a copy of any paper about your child. This includes:

• Safety plans
• Behaviour plans
• Meeting notes
• Any other documents

If they do not give you copies, ask for them. Send an email that says: “Please send me a copy of [name of document].”

You must agree before they make changes

The school cannot make a “safety plan” without your permission. You must understand the plan. They cannot finalise a plan, if you do not agree to it.

If you do not understand the plan, say: “I do not understand this plan. Please explain it to me.”

If you do not agree with the plan, say: “I do not agree with this plan.”

You can say no.

Step 3: Write everything down

It is very important to write down what happens. This creates a record. You might need this record later.

What to write down:

• Date and time of every meeting
• Who was at the meeting
• What people said
• What decisions were made
• How your child is doing

Send emails after meetings

After every meeting, send an email to the school. Write what you remember from the meeting.

Example: “Dear [Principal’s name],

Thank you for meeting with me today. This is what I remember from our meeting:

• We talked about [topic]
• You said [what they said]
• I said [what you said]
• We agreed to [what you agreed]

Please send me a copy of [any documents they mentioned].

Thank you, [Your name]”

Save all emails

Save every email the school sends you. Save every email you send to the school. Put them in a special folder.

Can I record meetings?

You have the legal right to record meetings in Canada without telling anyone. It’s called “one party consent”–you are the one party that consents. That means other people don’t need to agree or be told they are being recorded.

Schools often feel uncomfortable if they know you are recording, but if you don’t share the recording with them and use it only for your own understanding, it is legal and helpful in case you are scared and struggle to take notes. Download Otter.ai (free app), start recording before you enter the school, and keep your phone face down on the desk. Otter will transcribe the conversation to text for the first 45 minutes of any meeting for free.

Step 4: Ask for a designation

A “designation” is a special label that says your child needs extra help at school.

What is an H designation?

An H designation is for children who have:

• Behaviour challenges
• Mental health needs
• Learning differences
• Other disabilities

Usually when there is not a formal ‘diagnosis’ but your kid needs extra help at school H designation is a good place to start. When your child has an H designation, they get an IEP.

What is an IEP?

IEP means “Individualised Education Plan.” It is a written plan that says:

• What help your child needs
• Who will help your child
• What goals your child will work on

An IEP is very important. It gives your child the right to get help.

How do you get a designation?

You ask the school for it. The school looks at this checklist to decide: https://www2.gov.bc.ca/assets/gov/education/administration/kindergarten-to-grade-12/independent-schools/se_cat_chklst.pdf

Your child needs to have support from outside the school. This means support from a doctor or therapist. Ask your doctor or clinic for a letter stating your child needs extra support.

What if you don’t have a designation yet?

Ask for a Student Learning Plan (SLP). This is a simpler plan that still helps your child.

An SLP says what help your child needs, like:

• Extra help in the morning
• Check-ins 3 times per day
• Extra time to move between activities
• A quiet place to calm down
• Breaks when needed

Tell the school: “My child needs a Student Learning Plan.”

Step 5: Go to the doctor

You need a doctor to write down that your child needs help. This is called “documentation.”

What to do:

1. Make an appointment with your family doctor
2. If you don’t have a doctor, go to a walk-in clinic
3. Tell the doctor: “My child is having problems at school. The school says they have behaviour problems (or whatever they say is the problem). My child needs support.”

What the doctor will do:

The doctor will:

• Talk to you about your child
• Maybe talk to your child
• Write notes in your child’s file
• Maybe refer you to a specialist
• Maybe put you on a waitlist for assessment

You don’t need a full assessment right away

For an H designation, you just need to show that your child is getting outside support. Being on a waitlist counts. Having a doctor’s appointment counts.

The school just needs to know: “This child is seeing a doctor about these problems.”

Step 6: Go to Child and Youth Mental Health

Child and Youth Mental Health (CYMH) is a government service. They help children who have:

• Behaviour challenges
• Mental health problems
• Emotional difficulties
• Family stress

What is a drop-in?

A drop-in is a time when you can go to CYMH without an appointment. You just show up. You talk to someone. They will help you.

Find drop-in times here: https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/health/managing-your-health/mental-health-substance-use/child-teen-mental-health/mental-health-intake-clinics#intakeclinics

What happens at a drop-in:

1. You go to the CYMH office
2. You tell them about your child’s challenges at school
3. They ask you questions
4. They set up an appointment for an assessment
5. They tell you what services they can offer

This gives you more documentation to show the school.

Step 7: Get help if you are new to Canada

If you are new to Canada, you can get extra help.

ISSofBC (Immigrant Services Society of BC) helps newcomers. They have a Newcomers Services Program.

They can help you with:

• Learning English
• Understanding how schools work in Canada
• Finding other services
• Connecting with your community

Website: https://issbc.org/our-programs-service/bc-nsp/

They understand what it is like to be new to Canada. They can help you in your language.

Important things to remember

Your child has the right to go to school

Every child in Canada has the right to education. The school cannot take this away because of behaviour problems.

You are the expert on your child

You know your child better than anyone. The school needs to listen to you.

You can ask questions

If you don’t understand something, ask. Say: “Please explain that again. I don’t understand.”

You can take your time

If the school wants you to sign something, you can say: “I need time to think about this. I will tell you my answer tomorrow. Please email me a copy.”

You do not have to decide right away.

You can change your mind

If you agree to something and then change your mind, you can tell the school: “I changed my mind. I don’t agree to this anymore.”

You deserve respect

The school staff should treat you with respect. If they are rude or mean, you can complain. Talk to the principal. If the principal doesn’t help, talk to the school district office.

What to do if things get worse

Sometimes schools do not give children the help they need. Sometimes they try to make children go home early. Sometimes they suspend children.

If this happens:

File a complaint

You can file a complaint with:

• The school principal
• The school district office
• The BC Ombudsperson
• The BC Human Rights Tribunal

An advocate can help you do this.

Keep fighting for your child

Don’t give up. Your child deserves an education. Keep asking for help. Keep writing emails. Keep going to meetings.

You are doing the right thing by fighting for your child.

Where to get more help

InclusionBC

• Email: advocacy@inclusionbc.org
• They help parents advocate for their children

Immigrant Services Society of BC

• Website: https://issbc.org
• They help newcomers understand Canadian systems

Child and Youth Mental Health

• Drop-in clinics: https://www2.gov.bc.ca/gov/content/health/managing-your-health/mental-health-substance-use/child-teen-mental-health/mental-health-intake-clinics#intakeclinics

You can do this

Remember:

• Get an advocate
• Bring someone to meetings
• Write everything down
• Ask for a designation
• Go to the doctor
• Don’t give up

Your child is lucky to have you fighting for them.

Resources for families