Designed for despair
The emotional architecture that undergirds the entire ecosystem of harm: the delays, the silences, the polite betrayals, the shifting goalposts, the diagnostic suspicion, the endless meetings that lead nowhere, the gaslighting dressed up as concern. The systemic pattern that tells mothers their clarity is instability, that demands politeness while inflicting harm, and that rewards collapse with temporary reprieve. It complements designed to exhaust but reaches deeper—naming the psychic cost, the moral disorientation, the cumulative breaking. If maternal rage is the body’s protest, and epistemic silencing is the intellectual containment, then designed for despair is the affective strategy that binds them.
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A summer reading list for education leaders
The Canary Collective went upstream this week, and the gloves came off. In “Delay, Distract, and Deny”, Wren takes the old public-health parable about pulling bodies from a river and turns it into an indictment: while families stand waist-deep in the current keeping disabled children afloat, almost no one walks up the bank to ask who…
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Happy Mother’s Day, bitches
Mother’s Day for the mothers who are done being good: maternal rage, institutional failure, and why being reasonable was never enough.
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My Ollie is missing a lot of school
My Ollie has barely left his room since he came home exhausted from school one day last spring. He slept twenty-three hours a day for months. He barely spoke for months and had difficulty with basic hygiene. School chronically withdrew the supports he needed and pushed him to mask and comply until his nervous system…
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One day, everyone will have always been against this
There is a piece of street art circulating depicting a small child crouched beneath a descending bomb, gathering flowers from the ground, and beneath her the words: one day, everyone will have always been against this. That phrase — “one day, everyone will have always been against this” — comes from Omar El Akkad, reflecting…
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The cost of defending scarcity: moral injury and the exhaustion economy
The BC education system spends extraordinary resources defending scarcity while positioning that defence as fiscal responsibility, generating an exhaustion infrastructure that operates across every population the system touches—teachers, families, disabled children, administrators, support staff—all labouring to maintain stories that protect individual dignity within conditions designed to make moral action impossible. A recent analysis on Fund…
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Exclusion is economically irrational and the hidden costs of refusing accommodation
BC schools spend more money refusing accommodation than providing it. Learn when hiring a lawyer becomes the only fiscally rational choice for your family.
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What 8 years of advocacy took from our family
I advocate because I love my children and I want them to be well. Because I know the accommodations they require are entirely tenable, requiring only modest shifts in how adults think and respond. Because it is unbearable to watch them be slowly debilitated by a system that insists their needs are excessive and their…
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The business process trap
I’m a business analyst by trade, so I naturally wanted to understand how things work in schools, but resist the temptation to let schools draw you in!!! School districts speak a language designed to obscure accountability, using administrative complexity as armour against obligation, converting urgent need into bureaucratic procedure, and replacing immediate legal duty with…
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Discipline outcomes and statistics in BC school districts: what the statistics reveal about institutional protection
Schools are quick to label children as dysregulated when they struggle to process harm, respond slowly under stress, or push back against systems that have failed them. These labels carry consequences. What is less often examined is how institutions respond when they behave in the same way. A note I support parents making complaints when…
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Scapegoats for austerity: BC education funding excludes disabled children
BC education funding scapegoats disabled children, using collective punishment and performative inclusion to divide parents and maintain austerity.
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The cost of saying ‘change costs nothing’
Long before it became common sense, the spherical shape of the Earth was already known. Astronomers, mathematicians, and navigators across multiple ancient cultures—within the Hellenic world, in ancient India, in Islamic scholarship—had measured the Earth’s curvature, calculated its circumference with remarkable accuracy, and built navigational systems that depended on that knowledge. This was not speculative…
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The question they refused to ask: adequate funding and the architecture of denial in BC schools
Between 2017 and 2020, BC reviewed education funding. The question asked: designation or prevalence? The question refused: what would adequate funding cost?
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The internet has spoken: collective punishment in schools is wrong
When teachers punish entire classrooms for the actions of one student—when recess disappears because someone talked, when rewards vanish because someone forgot homework, when privileges evaporate because one child disrupted the lesson—students recognise the injustice immediately, and they name it with precision that educators often lack. Across TikTok, Instagram, and Reddit, students, parents, and teachers…
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The material costs of educational harm
My son no longer attends school. He no longer wants anything the education system offers. He has taught himself programming, navigates Linux with expertise that exceeds my own knowledge, learns alone in his room because learning with others became too expensive to survive. The district asks affectionately how he is, suggests I login to their…
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How collective punishment turns provincial funding failure into disabled children’s “behavioural failure”
Many years ago, my kindergarten child Robin went onto an ice field during recess. Robin was seeking sensory input—the visual shimmer, the cracking sound, the tactile feedback their nervous system required. The school had told students to avoid the ice for safety reasons. Robin’s support worker redirected them repeatedly; Robin kept returning. Eventually the principal…
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Three contexts, one experience: why autism debates fracture
The fracture happens before anyone finishes speaking. One person describes autism as neurological difference observable through brain imaging and cognitive testing; another person describes autism as diagnostic category that unlocks resources within rationed systems; a third person describes autism as lived experience of navigating a world built around neurotypical assumptions about communication, sensory processing, and…
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The return of functioning labels: How austerity turns advocacy into competition
A parent recently posted about profound autism, describing the experience of having her son’s reality erased when people say that “profound autism” doesn’t exist. Her frustration is legitimate—parents of children with intensive, lifelong support needs face profound institutional abandonment, and “profound autism” names a reality that deserves recognition and resources. But her post also illustrates…
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Why I won’t stop in 2026
The principal used collective punishment against my child almost two years ago, and yet I remain unreconciled to what she did. People suggest moving on, starting fresh, forgiving. Schools are obsessed with ‘fresh starts,’ framing each September as reset opportunity, as though institutional harm dissolves at arbitrary calendar boundaries. My daughter carries what happened in…
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The principal’s casualness reveals authorisation to harm
When a principal cancelled my daughter’s volleyball game with bureaucratic ease, her comfort while causing harm revealed systematic institutional authorisation.
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Exhaustion as governance in BC education
The spears came out fast when news broke that Coquitlam School District had spent $38,000 on a professional development retreat at Harrison Hot Springs—sharp, righteous, aimed directly at teachers who dared to spend two days somewhere pleasant while children sat in hallways, while families scrambled to find care for kids sent home at noon because…